Forgiven
by MakoStorm
Summary: She felt guilty about his death that wasn't her fault. Her friends are worried about her. Will she be able to get over her guilt? Sequel oneshot to Chosen Of My Heart, read that before reading this please.


Forgiven

"You let me die." Axel's angry voice sounded in the darkness. I spun around and saw a beaten, bloody Axel standing there with a gaping hole through his chest. "You let them kill me."

Tears streamed down my cheeks. "I tried! I tried Axel!" I fell to my knees and grasped my head. "Please stop! Stop haunting me!" The scene of Axel's death played in my head and I screamed…

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I woke up screaming and crying, my breaths coming in heavy gasps.

I sat there and trembled, trying to banish the effects of the dream from my head.

A pair of strong arms wrapped around me and I looked over to see Riku had woken up. I leaned into his embrace as he rubbed my back comfortingly. "It was the dream again wasn't it?" He asked quietly.

I nodded. "No matter how many people say I couldn't stop it I know I could have. I could have helped him."

Riku kissed my forehead gently. "There was nothing you could do. If you trust no one else on that then trust me, I wouldn't lie to you."

I nodded and sniffled.

He laid back down on his pillow and pulled me gently to lay beside him. "Go back to sleep. I'll watch over you and protect you from the dreams."

I smiled. "Hmm my knight in shining armor."

He smirked. "You know it princess." He kissed me on the lips before pulling me against his chest and covering us up. "Now go to sleep." I laid my head on his chest and listened to his heartbeat, sighing as he ran his fingers through my hair soothingly.

It had been six months since Saix had been destroyed and I had decided to live here. I'd been living with Riku for four. Kairi says she's waiting for him to pop the life changing question, knowing full well that Sora couldn't pluck up the courage to ask her first.

Personally I don't think he'll be asking anytime soon. He's a lot like Sora in a lot of ways whether he admits it or not.

I closed my eyes, not wanting to sleep but knowing I needed it.

The nightmares had started the first night after Axel's death and had gone on for three weeks afterward. Riku had taken to sitting at my bedside every night, stroking my hair and holding my hand, no matter how many times I said he didn't have to.

The nightmares slowed down and when I moved in with Riku they had all but stopped, I only had one occasionally. I think it's because Riku sleeps next to me every night. We never did anything, he just liked holding me each night, liked me lying next to him.

I snuggled closer to him as I drifted off and smiled when his hold tightened.

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Axel was back.

"Stop haunting me." I said firmly.

He smirked. "I wouldn't be haunting you if you hadn't let me die." He pointed at me. "If you hadn't been such a weakling you could have saved me."

"I tried!" I screamed, my determination wavering. "I tried to stop them! I begged!"

"But it didn't work did it?" He sneered. "I'm still dead." I fell to my knees again, wrapping my arms around myself. "I'm so sorry Axel. I tried."

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_Normal view_

Riku opened his eyes at the small cries and looked at the girl next to him. She whimpered as tears rolled down her face and Riku caught, "I'm so sorry Axel. I tired."

He gave a small sigh and pulled her as close to him as he could, her back against his chest. He placed his head on her shoulder and whispered softly in her ear. "It's alright. Shhh. It's just a dream." He rubbed her arm, trying to wake her softly. Her whimpers slowed and she opened her eyes. She looked at Riku apologetically. "I woke you didn't I?" He nodded and sat up, getting out of bed.

"Where are you going?" she asked but he shook his head. "It's not where I'm going, it's where we're going." He held out his hand and she took it, letting him lead her out of the room

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_OC view_

He led me downstairs and sat me on the couch before going to the kitchen. He came back a few minutes later with two mugs in his hands. He handed me one and I smiled. Hot chocolate; my favorite.

"Thank you." I said as he sat next to me and I scooted closer, pulling the blanket off the back of the couch and wrapping it around us as he wrapped an arm around me.

I cast my eyes around the house as we drank our chocolate in silence. This house used to belong to Riku's father. When we had returned to Destiny Islands after the Saix incident we found the town in a complete mess. Riku and Sora had both lost someone dear to them.

Sora and Riku both had something in common. They both only had one parent; Riku a father and Sora a mother. Both parents were lost during the invasion.

Both boys needed Kairi and I to help them through the following months, to break away from the pain and guilt of not being here when it happened.

The houses were legally theirs now and they fixed them up so they were livable again.

Then we and our friends (Tidus, Selphie and Wakka) started a restoration committee and Destiny Islands suddenly reminded us a lot of Radiant Garden. We worked hard along with others who volunteered to help and because of our efforts everyone in town had somewhere to sleep now and the town itself looked a lot better.

Riku's thumb did lazy circles on my arm and my eyes began to get heavy. I thought vaguely that I had to finish my hot chocolate. Someone took the cup from my hand and tucked the blanket tighter around me. I smiled into Riku's chest as I let slumber take me.

The dream didn't return.

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I didn't look good the next morning, actually I looked like hell. You could tell I needed sleep and there were shadows under my eyes.

Riku tried to get me to stay home and take a break from the restoration but I flat out refused and he sighed, shaking his head and saying once again that I was too stubborn.

We met the others outside Sora's and as soon as Kairi and Selphie saw me looks of concern crossed their faces. Kairi held understanding in her gaze as well.

"You feelin ok, ya?" Wakka asked and I nodded.

"Yep! I'm perfectly fine!" I said in false cheeriness and they all shot me looks telling me they didn't believe me. "What? I'm fine. Ok so I'm a little tired but that doesn't mean I can't work."

Tidus shook his head. "You look horrible."

"Gee thanks." I snorted.

"You should take a break from the restoration." Kairi said and Selphie nodded.

"No way. I'm perfectly capable of working, don't worry."

They all shot me stern looks and I took a step back. Riku was one thing but going up against the whole group, that was another entirely. Not even my stubbornness could go up against all of them.

"Oh come on guys, you're more protective than my brother." My heart panged as I said this and I know Riku saw it in my eyes because his gaze softened a bit.

He placed his hands on my shoulders. "Just one day. That's all, then you can go right back to work."

"But Riku…"

"Please? For me?"

I sighed, as soon as he said that I knew I'd have to agree. I always agreed when he said that. "All right. But one day and that's it."

He nodded.

I reached up and smacked him upside the head. "And that's for using that line on me _again._"

He rubbed the back of his head and grinned while the others laughed.

"It's not my fault you can't resist me." He ducked when I aimed a smack at him again.

He grabbed my wrists and pulled my against him. "Don't forget what happened last time you did that." He said and the memory of us up on the roof in Radiant Garden flashed through my mind. I pulled my wrists free and punched him in the arm before jogging away.

I stopped and turned to grin at him.

He shook his head and indicated in the direction we had come. "Home."

I pouted then sighed, nodding and waving bye to them all before taking off.

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I collapsed onto our bed as soon as I walked into our room. _Guess I was more exhausted than I thought. _I rolled over and closed my eyes.

I woke a few hours later and was surprised that I had slept for four hours! What surprised me even more was that it was a dreamless sleep.

I noticed the curtains were drawn and a blanket was draped over me. I smiled. _Riku. He must have come to check on me._

I sat up and got out of bed. I folded the blanket and placed it on the end of the bed. I walked downstairs and opened the front door. I was met with a cold breeze and shivered. Even though Destiny Islands was a tropical world it still got pretty cold in the winter time.

I looked for my jacket but couldn't remember where I had taken mine off. I decided to go without one and walked down to the beach.

I sat down in the sand, the waves lapping at the tips of my sneakers.

Remembering what I had said earlier I clasped the locket around my neck and opened it. There was my brother, grinning goofily at me. he wasn't really my brother, we'd grown up together and were best friends, he had practically lived at my house. I smiled at the memory of him punching a guy when he was messing with me. We soon called each other brother and sister along with everyone else around us.

A tear came to my eye as I thought about my parents and Jessy.

The sand crunched behind me and someone sat down, pulling me back against them. "I miss them." I said as I leaned back against them.

"Do you regret it?" Riku asked softly. "Staying I mean?"

I thought about it and Riku must have taken my silence for an answer because his embrace slackened slightly. "No." I finally replied. "I'm…sad…that I'll never see them again but if I could go back I'd still choose to stay here with you. I have no regrets."

I felt him smile and his embrace tightened again. A cold sea breeze hit us and I shivered. "Where's your jacket?" he asked and I shrugged. "Lost it…again."

He sighed and shook his head, taking his arms from around me and shrugging his jacket off. He wrapped it around me shoulders and I smiled, slipping my arms into the too long sleeves. "Thanks." His now bare arms wrapped around me again.

"Aren't you supposed to be working?"

"Yeah but we're all taking a break right now. Another half hour and it's back to work."

"Likely story. You're probably just slacking off." I gave a squeak of surprise when he picked me up bridal style, my arms instinctively going around his neck.

He wadded waist deep into the cold ocean and smirked at me.

"Don't even think about it buddy." I warned. "The last thing I need is to get sick."

"Then take it back."

I shook my head. "You know I never take anything back."

"Oh well." His grip slackened and I squealed. "Ok wait!" I shouted. I wiggled in his arms and took off the jacket, throwing onto the dry sand. "If you're gonna do it I want something dry to wear on the way home."

"Well it's no fun if you want me to do it."

"I don't wa-"

"Good." He cut me off and released me.

The icy water hit me and I gasped before going under. Riku laughed as I sat up and glared at him, soaking wet.

I tackled him into the water a second later.

A wave of cold water hit me in the face and I sent one back at Riku. We were soon stuck in a water war.

We stopped when we heard laughing on the shore. The gang was standing there watching us, laughing.

"You guys are crazy." Selphie laughed.

Riku and I pointed at each other. "He stared it!" "She started it!" We said together./

"Well finish it so we can get back to work." Kairi giggled.

Riku stood and reached his hand out to grasp mine. I pulled him back down into the water before standing up. "That's for starting it." I grinned, jogging to the shore.

Kairi shook her head and pointed in the direction of our house. "Go home and change before you get sick." She gave us both small shaves to get us going. "Go on shoo."

Ah Kairi, everyone's friend and mother. "Yes mom." I smiled at her before walking beside Riku up to the house.

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I was scared to go to sleep that night. I stayed up late watching TV, trying to fight the inevitable sleep.

"Sarah?" I looked up at the shirtless Riku on the stairs. "Are you coming to bed sometime tonight?"

I didn't answer and he sighed. "You can't not sleep just because of a dream. You were exhausted this morning, imagine how you'll be if you miss a whole night's sleep."

I bowed my head. He was right and I knew it but I didn't want to see that dream again, a hand on my shoulder brought me out of my thoughts. "Come to bed." Riku switched off the TV off and helped me to my feet.

I gave in and allowed him to lead me upstairs to our bed. He pulled the covers back for me to climb in and tucked me in.

I yawned as he crawled in next to me. I wrapped my arms around his waist, my face resting against his back. He grasped my hand and I gave a small smile before closing my eyes and slipping into slumber.

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As soon as I saw Axel I closed my eyes and bowed my head, resigning myself to the accusations that I was sure he'd throw at me.

They never came.

"What? Six months and I don't even get a hello?" He asked in thay cocky voice I had come to miss.

My head shot up and I studied him closely. He looked normal. He wasn't beaten and bloody, he was just Axel.

"Ok so what happened to you haunting me?"

He rolled his eyes. "That wasn't me, it was your conscience." He poked my forehead and gave a slight push, making me fall back a few steps. He crossed his arms and glared at me. "Enough of the 'it's my fault' crap already. So I died, been there done that, it wasn't your fault."

"But if could have stop-"

"No you couldn't have. I knew I was gonna die the minute they caught me, there's no escaping once they decided to kill you. Well except for Sora but he's different."

"So you just gave up?"

"Well I gave them hell about it and I didn't exactly go quietly." He smirked. "You don't wanna know where I gave Xaldin burns."

I giggled then sobered. "So if you're not haunting me, what are you doing here?"

"I'm here to knock you off the guilt ride and knock some sense into you." He smacked me upside the head and I protested loudly.

"But-" He clamped a hand over my mouth to shut me up. "Shut it. I came all the way from the lifestream to talk to you and you are not gonna waste my time."

"Lifestream?"

"Yeah, you know, the great river of life that every living thing goes to when it dies."

"Ok then."

"Now will you shut up and let me talk?" I nodded and waited quietly for him to continue. I only had to wait a few seconds.

"Ok first off. It. Was. Not. Your. Fault. I died and you couldn't do anything about it, get over it ok." He held up two fingers. "Second. You can count right?" He waved the fingers in front of me and I tried to swat them away only to have my hand go right through him. He grinned. "Ah the advantages of being a spirit. Anyway, second. You're worrying your friends way too much, especially your guy Riku, so cut it out. And third," He held up three fingers. "Well…" He scratched the back of his neck, looking like he was having trouble finding the right words. "Third…" His voice got a little quieter. "Third is, thanks."

I cocked my head, looking at him puzzled. "For what?"

"For what you said about me having a heart. You were right. I wouldn't be in the lifestream if I didn't have a heart."

I smiled and gave a cheery, "I told you so."

"And thanks for at least trying to get them spare me at the castle."

"you're welcome but, I still…"I trailed off.

"You still blame yourself right?" I nodded and he sighed. "What do you want, forgiveness? Fine." He grabbed my shoulders and gave me a shake. "I. forgive. You. Got it memorized?"

"Yeah. I got it. You forgive me." I smiled and he nodded in satisfaction.

"Good then get off the guilt train and get on with your life or I'll come back and kick your ass and make you get on with it."

I nodded.

"Well I gotta go."

"Wait! I'll see you again right?"

He shrugged. "I'll come visit once in a while if I feel like it." He smirked and I grinned before the world faded.

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I woke with a smile on my face and saw Riku sitting up watching me.

"What is it?" I asked groggily, stretching.

"That's the first time you've woken up with a smile in six months." He said, brushing hair from my face gently.

I smiled. "I had a good dream."

"Care to tell me what about?"

My smile widened. "Forgiveness."

Disclaimer: I own nothing KH or FF the characters (except Sarah) belong to Square Enix along with the lifestream ( from FF VII for those who don't know, great game you guys should play if you haven't already)

A/N: I got it up by this end of the week like I promised. Not bad right? I'm thinking about another sequel one-shot and if I do it, it won't be for a while and it'll be kinda like a song fic so if you don't like those… please read anyway.


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